Sunday, September 18, 2011

Raising Sons: We Have Their Childhood

Listening to this song while washing dishes, I flash-forwarded to a thought of dancing with my oldest son at his wedding. It made me teary. In that moment of giving my boy to his wife, all the silly, childish things he has done (and has yet to do) won't seem so terrible. In fact, they may even turn in to fond memories...things to laugh over--depending, that is, on how I handle the moment: will I crush his spirit with a sharp-tongued expression of my anger and frustration; or will I subdue my displeasure, resist the desire to sin in my own self, and teach his character?

See, the thing is, for our boys, we have their childhoods. Their wives have their futures. We are given each day in their most formative years to shape and guide who they become. We can do, as moms, what their wives cannot do. A wife cannot, or should not, mentor her husband into the character she hopes he displays day-to-day. Yet that is our mission as moms. A woman will someday choose our son as her husband largely due to the groundwork we have laid in forming his character.

Once grown, our sons may still make foolish choices that their wives have to deal with. But the poor decisions they make then will not be the same poor choices they make now. A 30-year old, for example, will not be getting in trouble for coloring on the walls, getting into Mom's makeup and perfume, splashing too much in the bathtub, being mean to his brother, putting a piece of paper in a candle flame...We get the childishness. Seen in the right perspective, we can use it to teach lessons that his future wife will reap.

So we are given these days. May we purposefully embrace our mission to love and train our children. May we remember, even on the bad days when childish behavior is at its worst, that we--unlike any other woman in our sons' lives--are given a chance to chisel these precious boys into godly men. May that vision drive us on.

(Sharing with Gratituesday at Heavenly Homemakers and Raising Homemakers)


  1. Wow! What a fantastic, convicting post! I have a 3yo son who is full of childishness! :-) Thank you so much for this reminder of my real job. I pray I can treasure these days and mold him to be like Christ. You are a blessing!

  2. Beautiful!!! Perfectly said!! :)

  3. I agree! what a beautiful post!

  4. Thanks Lauren! (And Brandy and Amanda).
    By the way, we named our daughter Lauren. Nice name :-)

  5. I have been thinking about this lately, myself. Thanks for the encouragement!