Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Silence is a Mom's Worst Nightmare

When my boys are home, silence is a terrible thing. It means destruction lurks behind the corner, devastation looms downstairs, and doom is inevitable upstairs. Free will in the house comes with a messy price.

Just a few days ago, while working on reading with my 6-year old, my other two sons and partners-in-crime, ages 4 and 3, traveled downstairs. I thought they were happily playing--it is, after all, the playroom; yet it was quiet. Too quiet. And that's never a good sign.

What I found was surprising. And infuriating. They had pumped out all the liquid soap in the bathroom, plus all the lotion from my Bath and Body Works Aromatherapy Orange Ginger Energy Body Lotion and my Bath and Body Works Aromatherapy Lavender Vanilla "Sleep" Body Lotion (which aren't cheap) and apparently decided their toys--including their LeapFrog Read and Sing Little Leap needed a massage.

The aromatherapy from the orange ginger lotion must have worked: they had plenty of energy. Unfortunately, the lavendar vanilla scent did not seem to calm me.
After a discussion about why we don't smear soap and lotion all over our toys, I thought we had checked that category of mischief off the list. Wrong. It morphed into a fascination with aerosol cans.
When I went upstairs after they were taking too long for a potty trip, I discovered that they started spraying Lysol on toys (not terrible I suppose, as we approach flu season), and in the toilet. Steady streams of toothpaste squeezed out in the toilet look like blue poo. And my makeup? Well, let's not even go there.
How do we keep our kids out of mischief? I'm not sure. But I'll tell you one thing--listen for the silence. Then proceed immediately and with caution, calming yourself in advance for what you're likely to find.


  1. I too have been a resent victim of a silent 3yr old...She was playing ever so quietly in our bedroom putting all her "babies" to sleep in the big bed, her toddler bed in the corner and of course the dogs bed...then it got very very was not until I heard her getting frustrated at something and whining that I went to look...She had discovered her Aero-chamber and Qvar (inhaled allergy med) pump that I had for the first time ever NOT put back in the medicine basket out of reach...She had proceeded to pump out all the contents of the less than a week old inhaler into the aero-chamber...(these inhalers only cost $78 each arg and I had to get a sample one from our Dr to replace it because I can't refill the prescription for a couple of months in-between)...fortunately it is a steroid and can't actually hurt or poison her AND she shared it with 6 of her babies...but yes lesson learnt here too.
    Oh and FYI, happy splashing noise that does not involve bath time...not good either.

    Blessings Kelsie

  2. I feel your pain! My then 2 year old and 4 year old dumped out a large trash can of flour on the basement floor last winter. The now 3 year old gets into stuff all the time, and he's very smart about how to reach stuff that I think is out of his reach. I never had these issues with the other 4!

  3. This is funny that I came across this today.My 3 year old climbed up onto a top shelf in her closet and pulled down EVERYTHING. including a moon dough farm. Which if you have ever experienced moon dough- Its not like play doh lets just say that. So her and her one year old sister had snow in the bedroom EVERYWHERE. Thankfully I did prepare myself because I knew it was to quiet for to long. I cant believe I didn't flip out. God gave me much needed patience for the hour clean up process :/ nice to know I'm not the only one.


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